Friday, September 23, 2005

and it came to pass

you know how sometimes, when you're in a certain situation, you think about the worst possible thing that can happen to you and then it doesn't happen and you're grateful and you move on with your life and ...

(this has a point. wait for it.)

the past few weeks, i had to go to the dentist twice. the first time, while my dentist (who also happens to be one of my best friends, which makes all the difference in my story) was drilling into my tartar, i was thinking, "what if the drill slides off my tooth and drills into the underside of my tongue?"

you know how sometimes, even without hearing the end of a story, you know how the rest of it goes?

well, there. need i say more?

ok, i will.

it happened during the second visit. the drilling-into-the-underside-of-tongue scenario. the sharp pain was aggravated by the shocked gasps from my two onlookers who wasted no time running out of the room in horror. to make it even worse, my dentist had trouble removing the embedded drill from under my tongue because it was lodged quite well – which makes sense if you think about the physics of screws. in fairness, maybe it took just a few seconds to remove. YOU try boring a hole under your tongue and tell me if 2 seconds doesn't feel like 2 months.

morals of the story:
- do not laugh while a dentist has dangerous machinery in your mouth.
- do not allow other friends to make wisecracks beside you while a dentist has dangerous machinery in your mouth.
- it is very easy to forgive well-meaning dentist friends.
- time heals all wounds ... including those accidentally drilled under your tongue.

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