Mama in New York (Part 2)*

Mama, Dad and sister Apple watched Wicked for the first time in New York this year. To the surprise of no one, they all loved it – including my father, who admitted later on that he did not understand a thing.

So when they got back home, Apple tried to explain bits of the play to Dad (this, to me, was the real surprise: that Ate actually paid attention) (LOL).

[Warning: 'Wicked' spoilers ahead]

Apple, speaking to Dad: (paraphrased) Some characters in Wicked became characters in the Wizard of Oz. For example, Fiyero became the Scarecrow, and Boq became the Tin Man. And then we saw Dorothy on the yellow brick road ...

Mama, the person who allegedly understood the play: (not paraphrased) So what happened to Alice in Wonderland?

(I'll let that sink in for a bit.)

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

My mother – defying both gravity and logic.

Elphaba became the Mad Hatter

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*You can read Part 1 here.

Mama in New York (Part 1)

Mama, Dad and older sister Apple were in New York in September to visit younger sister Mia. It was also US Open season so they were able to see a couple of games, much to my tennis-loving parents' happiness (Just an FYI: Apple couldn't care less about tennis, but she had nowhere else to go anyway. #shouldvebeenme).

One time, while just chilling in Mia's place, they caught one of Serena's matches on TV. You'll need to know that at the US Open this year, Ms Williams (who eventually won the slam) was wearing this:

Or sometimes this:

OK then.

So this is the conversation that followed after my mother, who was a teacher for most of her adult life, saw Serena for the first time:

Mama: Wow, tiger outfit!

Apple: Wrong animal, Ma. Try again.

Mama: Oh yeah ... I meant

...

LION.

L to R: Lion, Tiger (Not in photo: Serena's outfit)
You're welcome, Mama.

All the world's a (free) stage

It was September 5, 2014. A day had passed since my best friend Joemar decided to pack up his bags and move to a better, higher place. I promised his family I would buy some of the supplies we needed for the wake so as soon as I had some free time, I headed for SM Hypermarket, the most convenient option at the time. We had just a few hours to get the chapel ready.

Speed-shopping while in the depths of sadness was one of the more surreal things I've ever had to do in my life. I shed some tears in the aisle reserved for party items, deciding between smaller versus bigger (allegedly) biodegradable plates as though making the right choice would bring my friend back. After what seemed like a very long time staring at disposable cups and paper towels, I queued up to pay for the stuff that somehow ended up in my basket.

A smiley SM cashier started to ring up my items. She then asked me a question that seemed innocent enough:

"Do you have a free stage card?"

"A what?" I asked.

"A free stage card," she repeated.

A free stage card. A free stage card? Did I have a free stage card? What is a free stage card? Was I too sad to understand what a free stage card was? Did all those sleepless nights finally kill off my remaining neurons? Maybe I HAD a free stage card but had completely forgotten.

After a few long seconds of staring at the lady (who really just wanted to do her job well, I might add), I figured out that she was referring to this:

And at that moment, as I felt a small smile involuntarily forming on my lips, I had a feeling that things would be OK somehow.

Eventually. 

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PS. Joemar would've loved this story (and probably has that card).  

You can't handle the tooth

[To understand this anecdote, the only thing you need to know is that we live in Pasig, which suffered from an inexplicable mosquito deluge a few months ago. Also, there are many plants and trees in our garden and backyard, which might explain the number of insects that frequent our home despite the screens. So, to recap: our home = insect city. You may proceed.] 


When I saw Martina last week, she gave me the biggest toothy smile about 2 inches from my face. She didn't stop until I noticed that she had lost another one of her front teeth.

"Wow, Marteens! Did the tooth fairy visit?" I asked.

"Yes. I got 60 pesos ... but I really wanted 100."

"I don't think you should complain," I said, preachily. "When we were kids, we got zero pesos when we lost a tooth."

"WHAT!?!? THE TOOTH FAIRY NEVER VISITED YOU???"

"Never."

Then, after a longish pause and staring blankly for a minute, Martina excitedly said:

"I know why the tooth fairy never visited. Because she's afraid of mosquitos."

How to end a story

Practically speaking

The fateful day has arrived. Juancho has started to read my blog (hi Juanchy!). Ulp.

I warned him that there are a LOT of stories about him and Martina in here. He said, yes, he saw. He said the one about the 'wist' was funny.

Martina overheard and asked, 'What's a wist?' Then, to my surprise, Juancho proceeded to paraphrase the entire blog entry, including all my extra comments, which just goes to show that he deserves an award for reading comprehension. Paging Xavier (the school, not the Professor)!

After that 'wist' retelling, Juancho told Martina, 'Do you know that as of today, we are 5 years apart? I'm 12 now and you're still 7. Five years!'*

Martina: Yeah, PRACTICALLY.

Me: Wow! Big word. Good job.

Martina: I actually don't know what it means.

[laughter from everyone, loudest laugh from me]

And then ...

Juancho: You have to blog this!!!

Ergo, this.

The pressure to make more blog entries begins. Ulp #2.


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*They are just 4 years apart, but Juancho's birthday comes earlier in the year. 'Did I really have to explain that?' I ask myself.